Survivor: JT Makes History!

Yes, this kid is the Dumbest. Player. Ever.

Survivor: JT Makes History -
FOR THE DUMBEST SURVIVOR MOVE IN THE
ALL TIME HISTORY OF SURVIVOR!!

We'll get to that in a minute.

First, we had the Reward challenge in which the Survivors had to endure standing on increasingly smaller sizes of wood. The Villains correctly assumed that the Heroes would chose all men, and instead chose all women and won.

Note to producers: NEVER show us a close up of Ruperts feet again!

During this challenge, Sandra seemed to come out of her beeyatch shell and was actually charming and funny. She told a cute story about her and her husband going out to eat before he was deployed to Afghanistan. We kind of like her now.

Jeri cried tears of joy over winning a "Product Placement" Outback Steakhouse Meal. Complete with salad, grilled steak and shrimp and JOY! baked potatoes, wine and cocktails. Cocktails which Sandra slammed like a college kid with a beer bong. She then told an even funnier story while half drunk, which we can't remember because we were laughing at her being tipsy on Samoan Fruity drinks. Has she always been like this? Sandra's rating went WAY up last night.

OKAY. BACK TO "REALITY". The Unbelievable has happened. And in Survivor many, many unbelievable things have happened.
A few of our examples:
When Jonny Fairplay had his tribe in tears over his dead grandmother story, when she was alive and well.
When, James got voted out of the Game with not one, but 2! TWO! Immunity Idols IN HIS POCKET.
When Russell plays.

Well, what happened last night is completely and totally without precedent. J.T. aka The Most Delusioned and Stupid Survivor EVER, figured out, wrongly, we add, that the Villains since voting out all the guys except Russell are in an all girl alliance and that Russell needs to be saved so that when the tribes merge, JT will have Russell on his side. JT decided to give his Immunity Idol to Russell with a note, telling him all of that, plus asking Russell to vote out Ho-Bag Parvati and to keep it secret.

WHAT! Now, here's where it gets into Twilight Zone Territory. The Heroes agreed that this was a good move. They actually agreed to give Russell an Immunity Idol. Repeat: They actually AGREED, Rupert, Colby, et al, to GIVE THE IMMUNITY IDOL TO RUSSELL. WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWEEEE! Are you still there? We couldn't believe that in a million episodes of Survivor, a member of an OPPOSING Tribe would cross-lines and GIVE AWAY Immunity! It's....without words.

So, at the Immunity Challenge, Colby, The Hero whispered covertly to Russell, The Villain that they wanted to save him from the all-girl alliance and give him Immunity. Russell contained his astonishment and glee long enough to meet with JT on the sly and grab the package with the Idol and the note.

Back at Villains camp, Russell immediately did what JT asked him not to and shared everything with Parvati. Skip to Russell's interview: " Now I don't even have to find idols. People are just handing me idols. You don't give that to your enemy. Especially one named Russell Hantz."

We told you Russell is the greatest Survivor strategist of all time and with luck like this, will go down in history as an entire How To Play Survivor Handbook.

So the Villains gloated over JT being an idiot and having the Heroes thinking that the girls are in charge when it's Russell. And when they went to Tribal it was Courtney the Skelegirl that got booted and not Parvati. Parvati, who by the way found an immunity idol clue, stuffed it in her underwear and then gave it to Danielle who put it in her bra. EWWW! Parvati Ho-Bag then found the idol and shared it with Danielle and Danielle only, not Russell, who is on a "need to know basis and doesn't need to know"...

The Villains have 2 Immunity Idols in their tribe and didn't have to use one this week to vote out Courtney. The Heroes are done.

Did we mention Coach? The Dragon Slayer himself showed up for his first Jury appearance in full Samurai Warrior mode, complete with a full flowing robe Kimono and we swear, chop-sticks in his hair. He looked somber, sullen and very judgemental.

Even Probst blogged: COACH COMES STRONG AT TC
I would be remiss if I did not comment on Coach’s wardrobe as the first jury member. Love him or hate him, the man owns his “personae” and I dig it.

After watching every episode of Survivor for ten years now, we can honestly say that this is the best the show has ever been. We were almost scared when Boston Rob and Coach were booted that the show would deteriorate and would be boring. NO WAY! It just gets better and better this year....ask Jeff:

Jeff Probst's EW Blog

"I'm tellin you, Idols are falling from the sky, man!"